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Transcript:
Damon Frank (00:00):
Welcome back to recovered life. It is Damon Frank and I am here with always our favorite George Snyder life and recovery strategist. How you doing today, George?
George Snyder (00:12):
Hey. Good. Good to see you
Damon Frank (00:14):
Really good to see you. I've got a really great topic today that we were discussing on a phone call the other day and it is danger zones. That's what we're calling it. When you know that you are, could possibly be in danger because the holidays are happening right now. And a lot of parties going on, George, when do you know, and what should you do about the danger zone topic?
George Snyder (00:38):
You know, I think what happens is you get caught up in the flurry of activities and obligations. So I got to go here, I've got to go there. I gotta get, got to take care of that. And you can slide into these situations before you're even aware of it. Do you know what I mean? I think it's about not being, not really being present. I can really get out of myself out of my body, uh, during the holidays and just get caught up in, in the past, in the future, as soon as this, as soon as that, uh, and before, you know, it, you're suddenly in a situation where like, did I really agree to this? Does this make me? And so you have to be, uh, cognizant of that. Just does that make sense?
Damon Frank (01:17):
Yeah. I think awareness is really the big topic, right? Because one of the things that I know is that when you're going into a party or going into a situation that might be tricky for you, it might trigger you to do stuff. And you know, and a lot of people that watch this also are new to recovery, right? And so they haven't really been in situations like that. I always say, you have to have awareness. You have to be in the right here and now, and you have to check in with yourself before, during, and after those kinds of situations
George Snyder (01:46):
And be with the right people. And, you know, I say it all the time, everything's contagious. So you want to hang out with, people are gonna act, you're gonna catch what they got. So I think, uh, a wing, a wing man, uh, being aware, I mean, it depends early recovery sometimes we're so hyper-aware of not what we don't want to do. We can almost get through them without realizing it's can be a little later down the line when it's sorta like, Oh, I did that. That's not so big. And suddenly it's like, what's in this eggnog. You're like, oops. Yeah. So there's,
Damon Frank (02:26):
You do have to have a level of awareness about you about what's going on when you're in those situations. And you know, many people in, they find themselves during parties in bars or in people's homes, or, you know, at parties or situations where somebody just literally gives you some sort of alcohol or drug. Right. And you're, you're there. And if you haven't really thought through and kind of role-played that about how you would do that, how you would get out of that. And you're not aware all of a sudden you're in trouble,
George Snyder (02:56):
Right? I think too, I think one, the things I always say, what's the point and the point, I think for a lot of us in the holidays is people are trying to be nice. Now, people aren't trying to get you high, get you, well, maybe some are, but for the most part, people are just trying to be hospitable. And if then my rule is go early. So they know you're there. And don't say goodbye, because once things get party gets going, they're not going to miss you. What they're going to remember is that you came early and you were present.
Damon Frank (03:28):
Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And I think, know your limits too. Like I was talking with somebody the other day and he's new to recovery and he was saying, you know, I know that past seven 30, this is going to be a place that's going to be, it's going to be very uncomfortable for me. He goes about between the time of five and seven 30. He goes, there's a real reason for me to be at this event. And so he's now, you know, he's kind of rehearsed this with himself. So he knows when he gets there, he's going to make his exit around seven 25.
George Snyder (03:58):
Right. I used to think it was rude because things would get, start getting, start getting serious. And I thought, Oh, I would be impolite not to say I'm leaving. And that's when you know, no, man, now we're just getting now body shots, man. Now he can't leave now. So I learned that better to just slip away. So they're not going to miss you. They're only going to miss you if they think you're trying to break the party up, you know, or,
Damon Frank (04:20):
And you know, and as your true friends, if you're true friends, if you're really feeling uncomfortable, I, you, you mentioned the thing with the wing man. Right. And, and having a wing man or a wing woman that that is by you. Somebody that you could, that you could really, you know, trust to say, Hey, I'm feeling really uncomfortable. I think I have to leave. And you know, and that's okay. It's, it's better to leave people upset or wondering what happened. Then leave they're in a bad position.
George Snyder (04:49):
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Danger Zones During The Holiday Season