This is take two.
The first version of this video was beautiful. It was real, raw, heartfelt… and completely silent. My new mic didn’t work.
It felt fitting though—because this video is all about letting go of perfection.
I shot this in my garden, which, by the way, is a bit of a mess right now. No seeds planted. No soil hauled in. Nothing growing in the strawberry pot behind me. And the second I stepped into that space, I started beating myself up.
“I should’ve planted weeks ago.”
“Why didn’t I buy the soil when it was on sale?”
“You’re behind, Damon.”
Sound familiar?
We “should” all over ourselves.
We chase some invisible finish line of when everything’s perfect, and in doing so, we miss what’s actually happening right now.
Why Are We So Hard On Ourselves?
It’s a question I ask in this video—and honestly, one I’ve wrestled with throughout recovery.
We give grace to everyone else.
We root for them, support them, remind them they’re doing their best.
But when it comes to ourselves? We beat ourselves up.
Even when things are going well.
Even when the outcome looks great on paper.
I once closed a big deal—huge win. But the next day, I was filled with anxiety. Because I’d wrapped so much of my worth into that result, and it still didn’t feel like enough.
Here’s What I’m Learning (Again):
You can play full out without clinging to the outcome.
You can pursue excellence without needing it to go exactly your way.
You can be sober and successful—and still give yourself permission to breathe.
You can live your life with purpose without being choked by pressure.
In early sobriety, someone told me:
"I want to wear my recovery like a loose garment."
That stuck with me. I never wanted to live uptight and guarded. I’ve had enough fear in my life.
And yet… when I stop being present, when I obsess over what’s next, that fear creeps back in. And I forget that joy exists right here. Right now. Even with weeds in the garden.
Letting Go Before You Begin
One of the biggest lessons I’ve had to learn—and relearn—is this:
Let go before you even start.
Set your goals. Chase them with heart. But don’t tie your peace to a perfect outcome.
Because when we do, we miss out on the blessing that’s happening as we speak.
I’ll be planting some tomato plants soon—maybe not from seed, and maybe a little later than planned—but I’m showing up. And I’m letting go of whether or not I get fruit. I’m just enjoying the planting.
That’s recovery, too.
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